Letter to a Lost Friend

Dear my beloved friend,

a steadfast brother not by blood

or legality, as society directs it is

to be

written and signed cold

with a pen knife to my heart.

“I love you and I miss you”, I want

to say, to speak with

a voice

heard but I’m in another dimension

echoing into the wilderness

to where I must live in this world.

Alien is the language I speak

and think through a different tint 

of how I care deeply in my heart for the

steadfast friendly rock that you were.

“I miss you, I love you”

but I come with peace to your family

with treasured respect that flavours

who you are to me as roots

boring deep into my past as a sturdy

foundation

with a physicality from another dimension

that’s certainly not sexual love,

grasping at the wind, lost,

alone, because

society’s language has no words,

story or ability to frame it

for myself or to confide, no one speaks

this heretical love 

that isn’t loyalties of blood

or my soulmate alone,

and to understand it myself in order to walk on

to firm ground

that suddenly melted away in a second’s glance, flowing 

further and further away.

“I love you” 

and you mean the world to me, 

because you were there, 

do you hear me? 

No I don’t mean sexually 

or falling in love with my one and only.

Is it so wrong to care that doesn’t flutter 

with the whims of romance,

but I had no translator.

 

#amatonormativity #friendship #aromantic #queer